Curious adverts on The Box

At the gym this morn - while taking a jog on those whizz-bang running machines in my stripy boyleg gym kit - I was accosted by some most curious advertisements on that box device the manager always insists on having switched on. It being an hour before lunchtime, every channel on the blasted thing was screening food advertisements or cooking shows, from deep-fried nori stuffed with sea urchin, to shellfish and sushi. It made one feel mighty peaky to be giving it a hard slog on the running contraption, with mashed sea urchin innards squelching about before me. Amidst these gastronomic rumblings, out sprung a commerical for my fave chocolate snack, Kinoko no Yama (Toadstool Mountain).

Since living in Japan, I have often observed the Japanese obsession with cute little toadstools and have become obsessed with them myself. They adorn everything. Eco-bags, wrapping paper, furoshiki cloths, fridge magnets etc are emblazoned with Eurokitsch red-capped, white-spotted toadstools. In fact, so severe is my toadstool fixation, that I have acquired the nickname "Kinoko-chan" among my friends. The toadstool chocolates have a biscuit stalk with a chocolate cap - very charming bite-sized pieces! However, in the advertisement, a pretty young woman buys a box of the stuff at a convenience store, and whilst turning away from the shelves, a rather aggressive chocolate toadstool pops out from a nearby shelf and harangues her (over what, I know not). Now in the advert, the animated kinoko is not the same size as its chocolatey namesakes. In fact, it looks like a small, stunted willy. The overly swollen chocolate cap exaggerates this likeness. And for some reason, it hops about with an evil menacing look, a bit like Chucky in Child's Play. The young woman raises her eyebrows and looks discomfited. Perhaps the chocolate toadstool has put on the hard word? Anyway, the woman's reply mustn't have been what he wanted, for he hopped about on his stalk in a fine rage and at the climax of this amusing show of apoplexy, his cap popped off with an amusing "pfffft" and went sailing through the air. Capless, the poor chocolate kinoko crumpled to the floor (or, should I say, shelf), and the young woman dashed away.

Is my recent visit to the Willy Shrine messing with my mind? Dear reader, I hope not!

While I had to cling to the banister of my running machine for support after this surreal attack of deranged phallic toadstools made of chocolate, another strange advert announced itself. And again, it was about food. A man cooks kitsune udon noodles (literally "fox" noodles), and when he is about to eat them, an animated red fox jumps out at him, and throws back his foxy head to reveal a pink mohican hair-cut. The fox is suddenly donning a black leather jacket and holds an electric guitar, upon which he unleashes a roar of heavy metal, and head-bangs his newly acquired pink do to the music.

Horrors! thinks I, my two fave things have now taken on a rather bizarre, Japanese-TV-inspired aspect!

I couldn't locate these adverts on YouTube, but I found an old ad for Kinoko no Yama which is quite endearing. The closing scene of the characters dancing around the toadstool brought to mind my days in Brownies, when as a Leprechaun (in England) and a Muluka (in Australia) we danced around a brightly painted wooden toadstool, on which was perched the sacred brown owl (as opposed to the living Brown Owl, who's weight would not have been accommodated by said toadstool).

The Best Bento-Box Ever

It's a delight to pack one's lunch into this sporty-but-vintage gal bento-box ...

Tomorrow's lunch is couscous salad, and rice topped with sesame sauce, plum and seaweed topping.

I can wrap up my bento-box using this furoshiki cloth and carry it by the knot - no plastic!

Or I can use this matching tote. Anyone for tennis?

The Famous Five Head to Radish Island

Miss Usagi, Mr K, their dear landowners and myself took a day trip during Golden Week to winkle out the smugglers at Daikonshima or Radish Island. I was more than taken aback when not even a root-end of a radish (or smuggler, for that matter) could be spotted, but everywhere I turned I came upon a blooming peony. Yes, Radish Island is Shimane's famous home to peonies and they are abundant. Saint Bernard's beard, they even have their own individual woven huts! And the gardens were splendid.

Peony tee-pees in artificial twilight

Zen

Wisteria abuzz with bees

Irises: along with koi carp, symbols of Boys' Day

Carp fleeing storm

Our island adventures concluded sheltering from the fierce wind with a cup of maccha latte in hand

The Famed Phallic Forms of Yaegaki Shrine

After our carp-streamer viewing, Miss T and I popped into Yaegaki Shrine, a shrine to fertility, virility, and marriage. Here many a coy young couple wander, praying for wedded bliss, and groups of women cast a coin and hope for a child. I first visited this place with my host family, and was alarmed when my host mother (in her fifties) caressed the famed wooden phallic structure (upon which I lean in the pic below). Not for the faint of heart, at this shrine willies lurk in tree-hollows, around corners, and by the wayside.

People place coins around the towering bits of wood, as well as the ceramic mouths of female netherlands, for luck in Baking Assorted Loaves in the Oven. Further back in the shrine grounds are two old, enormous sacred trees, wound about with rope and folded paper decorations, and at a pond, couples lay a paper prayer on the water's surface, and upon this place a coin: the longer it takes to sink, the longer it will take to marry.

Oo er, what have we here?

There are naughty things to be found in hollow places

Saucy tanuki

For more willies, take a right.

Touch wood

Kodomo no hi: Children's Day

The koi streamers fluttered on high winds over the river in honour of Children's Day (formerly Boys' Day) on May 5th. Miss T and I took the motorcar to Yakumo and picnicked under the giddying currents of carp. It was idyllic to while away the afternoon under their glinting eyes in the frail light of a ghostly sun.